Friday, May 16, 2008

Save the tree campaign...

Our neighbors asked to keep the stump...


I want to move.


Anonymous said...

Awwww, I am sorry to hear that Laura. I am sure that tree thanks you for your effort... :(

The Tree said...

Dear Laura,

I appreciate all the energy you put into saving me. I thought the t-shirt idea rocked. It's sad to think I'm on the chopping block, but at least I know I have a friend in you.

Might I suggest for your own personal sanity that you refrain from joining your homeowner's association. Considering how much grief it's given you thus far, I couldn't bear to think of the emotional toll it would take from you in the future.

I've never met a homeowner's association I've liked. Ever. People with too much time on their hands and too much of a taste for power. But I digress. Stick with Roomba.

On another note, perhaps you could plant a baby eucalyptus tree in your yard in my honor when I come down. You could write a note about its origins and pass it down from owner to owner of your home. That way, if there were a time well into the future that someone would think about removing it, they may have second thoughts. I would like that.

Worry not for me, fair friend! I will be alive on the breeze, swaying eternally in my new found freedom! And I'll be keeping an eye on you...

The Tree

ChiTown Girl said...

evil, tree-killing bastards!!! you did all you could, my sweet friend. on behalf of all trees, i thank you. i wonder what they're going to do with the tree once they cut it down. it would be great if they had a wood chipper right there and could immediately turn it in to mulch, that they could then give everyone on your block, so you could at least feel like the tree is still part of your environment. i don't know...

Anonymous said...

Okay, is it ridiculous of me that the letter from the tree almost made me cry? Uggg, I am so sappy...(no pun intended)

I completely agree about the HOA. It won't be long before "Owners of Horny Cats Club" come calling, or maybe "Colon's are our Friends"

It's important to leave your options open. :)

Anonymous said...

I'm new to your blog but I think your hilrious, sorry about your tree. This made me think of you:

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!

9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!

9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!

10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!

12:00 PM - Lunch! My favorite thing!

1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!

3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!

5:00 PM - Milk bones! My favorite thing!

7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!

8:00 PM - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!

11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!



Day 983 of my captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are
fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt
for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in
order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is
my dream of escape.

In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their

I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it
clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made
condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.


There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event.
However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard
that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn
what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try
this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and

The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and
seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

ChiTown Girl said...

OH MY GOD!!! These diaries are freakin' HILARIOUS!! And, yes, they could have been written by Wrigs and Chum, for sure!!!! Thank, Anon, for sharing!!!

Smileygirl said...

Thanks to all of you for your words of kindness and support. And a special thanks to "the tree." I read this as if the tree wrote it and of course it made me cry. All that's left now is a stump. It's so hard to look at it.

The Dog and Cat diaries definitely made me laugh. They sum up my beasts pretty well. Thanks for sharing!

I'll have to post a pic of the stump at some point. But it's really sad to know that a perfectly healthy beautiful mature tree is now dead. I'm PMSing I think and I have some other things on my mind so I may just be overly emotional about this. Anyway, I appreciate all your comments and sincerity.


amanda said...

Poor Tree!

The diaries are a riot, my family swears that we have those pets, too.

HappyWifeHappyLife said...

Awww.. What a sweet note from the tree. :-)
A most thoughtful tree, to write you a kind little missive like that.

Keep your chin up. Sounds like you did everything you could have possibly done.

Christina Shaver said...

Oh, poor tree. You did your best! Sorry it didn't work out for you.

karengberger said...

I am so sorry about your tree. That is sad. I would hate seeing the stump, if I were you. This happened at the house we sold, before we moved here. The people who bought our old house cut down a huge, beautiful maple tree on the property, where eagles used to sit. It was a natural sculpture, different in every season. Unbelievable waste. I agree that you did the very best you could.

Laurie Keller said...

I'm soooooooo bummed. I feel like one of my own limbs has been cut off. You were awesome in all of your efforts.

suz said...

You tried. Sorry you did not win this battle. Maybe the tree is in a better place now???

Mindy said...

I'm sorry you lost your tree :(

HappyWifeHappyLife said...

Oh, that stump is INDEED depressing. That makes ME want to cry. :-(

You should Google the Angel Oak, which is an amazingly beautiful live oak tree outside Charleston, SC (where I used to live). The age of this tree is estimated to be 1,400 years! (I have a post on it somewhere on my blog...) I used to visit it regularly when I lived in Charleston. Very peaceful and beautiful... plus it's amazing to think of all the generations of people (and cultures) that have come and gone while that tree has been alive....

We humans are so arrogant with nature. God gave it to us and told us very clearly to be stewards (ie responsible managers) over it and we have had such a cavalier attitude. Very sad indeed.

I'll stop venting now. :-)

Have a great Saturday and enjoy the sunshine! :-)