Monday, April 21, 2008

I'm a Roomba Advisor!!

How thrilled was I when I got this email today...(click to enlarge, it's too tiny)

I mean, are you kidding me???? Have they read the e-mails I've sent to them??? Though this is addressed to Tom (we used his name to register) I will be the one sitting amongst this very dignified panel of vacuum connoisseurs. Perhaps I'll introduce myself with a simple video or poem about the Roomba...

"Roomba Roomba on the wall...
WHY THE HELL DON'T YOU F*CKING WORK!?!?!"

deep breaths...

I wonder if I'll get to attend any fancy pants i-Robot banquets or vacuum conventions. I know they said the surveys are web-based but I'm going to push for a face to face round table of sorts with all the other "diverse and dynamic" Roomba advisors so we can hammer out these issues with the Roomba.

Or...at the very least, take a hammer to the Roomba.

Here's my list of action items:

1) Get the Roomba to work.
2) Change the damn lady's voice on the recording!!! (Maybe use a cartoon character like a Smurf or Chipmunk or give you the option to record your own message of doom).
3) Install some sort of mechanical arm device so when it gets wedged underneath furniture it can jack itself up and free itself.
4) Make it fire retardant because that thing will eventually blow itself up (on the rare occasion the motor runs for more than 10 minutes).
5) Install some sort of scented spraying device to eliminate nasty burning rubber smell.
6) And fix that little spindly spider arm brush on the side that keeps snapping off!

Oh and I'd also like to let them know that they are turning this world into a bunch of lazy asses. Have you seen the latest? The i- Robot Looj? Next thing you know these things will be cooking dinner and sleeping with our husbands. Ok now that I think of it, I may need to add that as an action item.

I think I'm going to sign all my e-mails like this...

Kind Regards,
Laura
2008 Roomba Advisory Board Panel Member

Jealous??

This is quite an honor.

6 comments:

Mindy said...

I almost hit the screen myself with that damn ant! LMAO!! I am dying for one of these:

Litter Robot

I am sooo tired of inhaling litter!

ChiTown Girl said...

Oh my God! Too funny!! You seriously need to be a part of this "advisory board." And you should send that video clip, for sure!!! I'll bet someone over there has a sense of humor, and can appreciate it.

meg said...

OK, I have to ask what is the little bug crawling under the playlist??!

Smileygirl said...

That lil' bug is from Mindy's blog. When I saw it on her page I freaked thinking it was real. So I had to post it on mine in hopes to freak all of you out too!

Kristin said...

HA! This is very funny. I got to try a roomba out for a weekend and I loved it, probably because it actually worked.

meg said...

It worked!!!! I kept thinking it was on my screen!!!!!