Around 6:30 the doorbell rings and it's our 5 year old neighbor Marissa, who is the CUTEST little girl in all of California. I open the door just a little because Chum is trying to get at her. She asks, "Can you come over for a cocktail?" Who can say no to that?!? So I said of course, put on some shoes and brought Wrigs along to play with their Golden, Lola, who humps poor Wrigs non stop. He just sits there and cries while she does it. He is SUCH a baby.
I'm greeted with my first Tequila Sunrise (not first ever, this was just the FIRST one of the night.) It was STRONG so I sipped it. We're outside chatting and playing this crazy tennis game with huge oversized tennis rackets and it was a lot of fun. Tom calls about an hour later and I hand the phone to Marissa to pretend that it's me. I was telling her what to say to him. They were on the phone almost 5 minutes! He realized it wasn't me but it was so funny to hear her ask him all these questions in a child's voice, "HOWWWW'S work??" then she'd giggle and say "When are you COOOMING HOOOOOOME?" We were all laughing so hard. Well this sparked an interest in her to make more phone calls to more people. So we called my friend Becky and they chatted for a while and when she got off the phone Marissa says, "If I keep hanging around you I'll end up in AA." Her parents got such a kick out of that one. Thanks Becky!
Tom heads over finally and has his first drink of the night. Marissa and I were playing with the fart machine that I brought and then I made the mistake of telling her that I usually prank call restaurants using the fart machine in the background (Outback is a personal favorite to call.) Her eyes got sooo big and she asked, "What do you sayyyyy?" I told her that I'll say something like (edited a little), "I am calling because I was just in your restaurant and I ordered a Bloomin' Onion...and now I'm on the toilet with bad poopies!" (then I start clicking the fart machine noise in the background.) Marissa laughed the loudest belly laugh I've ever heard a kid make. And she was stomping her feet. She exclaims, "Let's call them NOW!!!" I told her that it's probably not a good idea because we could get in trouble and that sometimes I get in trouble with Tom when I make these calls. So then we decided to pretend to prank call each other, so she holds her hand in the shape of phone and pretends to dial me. The adults are sitting off a little ways, involved in some serious conversation about a car or motorcycle accident, I couldn't really hear, and Marissa and I are sitting on this little stoop. So she dials me up and says, "Hello?" I say, "Hello." She then says, "Hi, do you want to know something?" I say, "Sure, what is it?" She says quite loud, "Sometimes??? I poop AND pee at the SAME TIME!! BYE!!!" And then erupts into more belly laughs. I am now doubled over trying not to spit out my drink, my cheeks and stomach hurting. After the laughter subsides, she looks at me all serious and says very matter of fact, "Looora? I really don't poo and pee at the same time. I just made that up." My God, I love this kid.
So the night goes on and we realize at 10:30 that none of us have eaten dinner. We're a bit buzzed from the cocktails so we want to order something that can be delivered. But we all want steaks. So the 3 guys head off to the nearest grocery store which is just down the street to get steaks and a side dish. I'm thinking, "Can we trust them to get this on their own?" They come back with Steaks and Blueberry pound cake. The party's now been moved to our back yard and as I'm looking through the bag of food I said, "This is it??" Tom says, "Yeah. That's what everyone wanted, Steaks. Get some plates down and we'll have steaks on a plate." I'm looking at him like he's on crack but I reach for the plates and then he says, "Wait! We're having steaks AND cake on plates! Steaks and cakes on plates!" And he thinks this is the funniest thing ever. He said it at least 3 more times and would laugh and laugh and laugh. Yeah he was a bit sloshed. Ok the waves of nausea are hitting me again. I'll post this for now and add more later....
1 comment:
This is a great story. Some of the best fun I've ever had has been at house parties/get-togethers (instead of bars & restaurants).
Hope you feel much better today. It's Sunday!
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