Fortunately

Ok so now it's after 2:00am and I can't sleep. Why you ask? Well because I have a nagging headache and am overcome by the toxic fumes from yet another NEW plastic shower curtain on our bed. Tom has no problem falling asleep, nor does this snoring cat next to me (the reason for the new curtain.) Chumley has been on a peeing spree the last few days and according to Tom, it's only a matter of time before he meets his maker (who that is, we're not so sure.)

Sunday afternoon Tom took Chum's upstairs litter box outside for a good scrubbing. So Chum was without it for a good 45 minutes. He still had the one downstairs for back up but apparently he's too lazy to walk down a flight of stairs, so instead he unloads all over our bed. Fortunately, it was curtained. Unfortunately, we didn't realize this until later in the night before we headed up to bed around midnight. Tom whipped off the shower curtain and was himself, showered in Chumley's urine. It also got all over the floor, the bottom half of the comforter and it dripped down onto the foot board of the bed. Tom was exhausted and jet lagged but had to head into the shower to clean himself and the shower curtain. I took care of floor and comforter clean up as Chumley just sat back and watched. Living this way for 13 years reminds me of a book I loved as a kid,Fortunately by Remi Charlip. It's about a series of good, then bad events that happen to a boy named Ned.

Here's an excerpt:
Fortunately, Ned was invited to a surprise party.
Unfortunately, the party was a thousand miles away.
Fortunately, a friend loaned Ned an airplane.
Unfortunately, the motor exploded.
Fortunately, there was a parachute in the airplane.
Unfortunately, there was a hole in the parachute.

So, I thought I'd list what it's been like with Chumley:
Fortunately, Chumley is now 13 years old.
Unfortunately, he's as healthy as an ox and has the potential to last another decade.

Fortunately, he can be good when bribed with his favorite food, hot broccoli.
Unfortunately, the broccoli must pass through his digestive system and into his litter box.

Fortunately, unwelcome intruders will never make it past the front door.
Unfortunately, family and dear friends have have left our home screaming and bloody.

Fortunately, at night Chumley finds comfort sleeping on the pillow with me.
Unfortunately, due to his diet, he often blows bottom bubbles directly at my face.

Fortunately, Tom is able to come up with helpful suggestions when dealing with Chumley.
Unfortunately, his latest one involves drop kicking him off our balcony into a coyote filled hillside.