I'd like to blog about something that I can only refer to as "mom mail". Mom mail comes to me in the form of a sweet little card with smiling cartoon puppies, only to house various articles on "how to survive an anthrax attack" or "woman strangled while riding escalator in long scarf". Here are just a few that I came across while sorting through boxes and tubs of cards and notes since we moved. Will it ever end?!
Often times, she'll scribble little notes around the xeroxed page (my mom also sends these alerts to my sister and cousins)
(FYI, my mom always told me NEVER to put my head under water in a hot tub because my hair would get sucked into the drain resulting in a slow, tortuous death)
(this is good to know seeing we love to pot poisonous plants in and around our home)
The best is when she adds a personal "I know someone who" tidbit onto the page. For example:
Surgery on the leg for strep??? Hmmm. I don't question anymore. I just tell her thanks for the info and myself and my legs will stay away from potential strep carriers.
Oh and then when we moved to S. Cal in '03, my mom sent me this article along with a card detailing that we MUST AVOID DRIVING ON THE 405 AT ALL TIMES!!! She envisioned snipers hiding on the roadside, shooting at cars left and right. (Ok, so she's kind of got a point here.)
And apparently my mom would like us to stop eating fish. I thought fish was good for you?!?!?!
Oh but blueberries are still ok to eat. Phew. I just had some with breakfast this morning.
But I guess I shouldn't have put on any mascara or lipstick. I feel an itchy rash coming on now!
And in case Chumley ever decides to hop a flight he better steer clear of the cockpit:
Seriously this is just too much to think about. It hurts my head. Time for a drink. But not to worry mom - I'll skip the aspirin...