my friend Peter

Back in September our good friend Peter came out to Seattle for a visit. This was before I was diagnosed with my colon condition and I felt so bad because this was our last full day together and we had planned to spend it at a winery in Woodinville. Sadly, it didn't turn out that way. Peter has a great way of telling a story and he typed this up after his visit and even though months have passed, I want to share it on here.

He titled it, "Laura's Intestinal Adventures" by Peter.

"On my last trip to Seattle, Tom, Laura and I decided to do a special lunch outing, hiking about three or four miles to a restaurant known for it's fish and chips and outdoor patio, where we could keep Wrigley tied up and close to us while we ate. Wrigley got some exercise, we all got some good food, it was a beautiful sunny day - perfect outing. So far.

We started the walk back to the house, stopping at a garage sale along the way, Amy called to see how we were; we bought some weird insulin bottles from the yard sale - sounds weird, but they looked kind of artsy-craftsy. We continued on our way home, I was talking to Amy, when Tom and Laura, who were walking ahead of me, stopped. Suddenly Laura was down on the ground. I told Amy I had to go.

Laura was crying, saying her insides hurt. Tom was trying to be consoling, but also a bit frustrated with the situation. We were in a neighborhood with all single-family homes, well manicured lawns, without a place to obtain a little privacy. Which was bad, because Laura was having issue in the Number Two department.

"What would you like me to do Laura?" Tom asked. Laura didn't know... it was about another two or three miles to get home and get the car. Tom continued: "you should have used the bathroom before we left." "I tried Tom!" Laura said. "I can't just make it happen!" Wrigley was getting fidgety and things weren't looking good. But as luck would have it, there was a sign advertising an Open House on the cross street where we stopped, so this provided an opportunity for a desperate plan.

Tom had a friend who was looking for a house in the area, so that would provide a pretext for him to ask the realtor about the house, and for Laura to use the bathroom. We discussed the plan, it wasn't the best - they couldn't bring Wrigley, I would have to stay with him, and Tom was worried he would freak out. With no other obvious options, this was the plan we had to go with. Off Tom and Laura went to the house, about a quarter mile off, and I hung out with Wrigley.

Wrigley was mostly well-behaved, but a bit fidgety, occasionally he would look in the direction of Tom and Laura as they disappeared from view, and bark. I would say "Wrigley, stop being a baby!" and he would calm down. Tom and Laura were gone for about 25 minutes.

When they came back, we discussed what our next plans would be - Tom was going to go for the car, I would wait with Laura. Tom took Wrigley and left, and Laura started to have digestive problems again.

I suggested that we walk back to the open house. Laura walked beside me, in small, brisk steps, as if she were squeezing her thighs together. We got up to the house - there was some mint-condition vintage automobile under a canopy. We stepped into the house, and there was a waterfall set into the wall, with mosaic tiling, nice carpeting, and a sweeping staircase leading upstairs, where you could hear the realtor discussing the house with a couple.... this was a house for rich people. Laura bolted into the bathroom, then came out after about five minutes. We went out onto the driveway and hung out for a few minutes, then Laura bolted back into the bathroom, keeping her thighs squeezed together. This process repeated itself several times. At one point I was just waiting on the driveway, when the couple came out. They put on the shoes they had left at the bottom of the stairs and left. Laura was taking some time in the bathroom. I could hear the realtor walking around upstairs, so I figured I should make our presence known.

I walked upstairs, the realtor said hello. I said "Do you remember the couple that was here before? There was a guy in a baseball cap checking out the house?" He did. "Well, his wife is feeling... kind of sick. She's in the downstairs bathroom. I just wanted to let you know she's here. She's kind of embarrassed. Sorry to impose on you... we're just waiting for her husband to come back with the car." The realtor was incredibly nice and understanding and said not to worry about it; what a relief! Laura came out, we hung out outside, and Tom came with the car.

Obviously the rest of the day was spent indoors."

Tuxes & Tails

This weekend, I was thrilled to be a part of Seattle Humane Society's annual fundraiser, Tuxes & Tails. I got to experience this event both as a volunteer as well as a guest for the gala and it was incredible. Over $665,000 was raised in just a matter of hours. So many people with big hearts, wanting to help the animals as well as families who have difficulty caring for their animals. It makes you feel pretty good inside to know there are so many people who care. It was also the first time since moving to Seattle that I actually wore a dress, and that felt pretty good too!

Here are some pics from the Animal Fashion Show:





And here's a pic of me and Tom posing under the "Catsino Royale" sign. Looks like Prom night:



Here's a shot of some of our table attendees - the 2 gentlemen in the middle are our dear friends Mike and Gary. We met them shortly after moving to Seattle through our friends David and Mark in LA (Karyn's Mark):



Gary's tie matched the back of my dress so we had to snap a pic together, even though it's kind of hard to see the details of the dress, which was embroidered with pretty pink roses:



I'd also like to thank my friends at Fresh Wave for supplying the most fantastic auction baskets for the event. I started working with Fresh Wave back in 2003 when they launched their consumer line and now here we are 7 years later still going strong!


Good people and a great cause, all rolled into one.

More momisms

Last week I flew to Chicago to surprise my mom. My sister arrived about 2 hours before my flight was due to land. She flew in from Orange County, into Milwaukee because Southwest doesn't fly to O'hare. Our "scheme" was once she landed she told my mom that one of her bags accidentally got sent to O'hare, where I would be waiting. My mom (who spent years in the travel industry) said, "That's odd! Southwest doesn't fly to O'hare!" My sister said she didn't understand it either but that they needed to drive down to get her bag. Someone would be standing outside holding a sign with her name on it and that someone would be me. As they pulled up to the curb, I held up the sign, covering my face at first and when my mom opened the passenger door she started to say, "Oh, you look so much like...", then she realized it was me and lost it. FULL ON TEARS, then she sat back down in her seat for a few moments, speechless. It was one of the best surprises we've ever pulled off.

We celebrated my mom's 75th birthday and also were there for her cataract surgery. I was able to see Tom's Dad who is still hospitalized (sadly now back in ICU) but overall it was a very productive visit with family.

So here are the momisms from my visit:

-The morning of my mom's eye surgery we took a shuttle van from the hotel to the hospital and as my mom was about to disembark the van she asked the driver if he had a catapult. We think she meant catwalk but not quite sure.

-While filling out the paperwork for her surgery she said "I want to check the box that says do not necessitate."

-After her surgery, the nurse asked her how she was feeling and she kept saying, "I just feel like...punk."

-On the way home from the hospital she was a little out of it in the backseat and out of the blue she says, "I really need to get home so I can make you girls a sandwich!"

-While visiting an open house in her neighborhood she tells the realtor, "I have a friend who will be downloading, so she needs a smaller place."

-She asks me and my sister, "Have you guys seen the movie The Broad Side?" (we both say "No" knowing she meant the Blind Side.)

-Before making a phone call on her home phone she pretended to hit the buttons really fast while squinting into the phone. Then she says, "See? I'm teching, just like you guys do." (she meant texting)

-One morning it was pretty chilly and my mom had on a light weight jacket. I asked if the jacket was warm enough and she said, "Oh yes. And it breaks wind."

-At her follow up eye appointment she told the doctor when she can't see someone's face that well she has to look at them geeky.

I love my mom.

Banana toy stand off (AGAIN)

Earlier today Chum was playing quietly with his banana toy. It was so sweet, he would toss it up in the air then pounce on it and roll over with it in his front paws while kicking it with his back paws. Then out of nowhere, Wrigs enters the picture and swipes it right out of his mitts. Chum was NOT happy about that but instead of going after Wrigs, he took it out on me. Wrigley was following behind, gloating, with the banana hanging out of his mouth.



Here they are side glancing at each other to see who will get the banana.



And when Chum is really worked up, he'll howl/bellow/moan throughout the house.



I finally had to hide the banana in the pantry because the two of them can't handle being in the same room with it.

never realized...

how much I missed Chicago 'til I moved to Seattle.

Ain't life funny???

Anyway, longer post to come about my trip to surprise my mom for her 75th birthday as well as a SLEW of momisms.

I need to be better about updating on here. So much to say, so little time.

Slew of Momisms

Last week I flew to Chicago to surprise my mom. My sister arrived about 2 hours before my flight was due to land. She flew in from Orange County, into Milwaukee because Southwest doesn't fly to O'hare. Our "scheme" was once she landed she told my mom that one of her bags accidentally got sent to O'hare, where I would be waiting. My mom (who spent years in the travel industry) said, "That's odd! Southwest doesn't fly to O'hare!" My sister said she didn't understand it either but that they needed to drive down to get her bag. Someone would be standing outside holding a sign with her name on it and that someone would be me. As they pulled up to the curb, I held up the sign, covering my face at first and when my mom opened the passenger door she started to say, "Oh, you look so much like...", then she realized it was me and lost it. FULL ON TEARS, then she sat back down in her seat for a few moments, speechless. It was one of the best surprises we've ever pulled off.

We celebrated my mom's 75th birthday and also were there for her cataract surgery. I was able to see Tom's Dad who is back in the hospital (sadly now back in ICU) but overall it was a very productive visit with family.

So here are the momisms from my visit.

-The morning of my mom's eye surgery we took a shuttle van from the hotel to the hospital and as my mom was about to disembark the van she asked the driver if he had a catapult. We think she meant catwalk but not quite sure.

-While filling out the paperwork for her surgery she said "I want to check the box that says do not necessitate."

-After her surgery, the nurse asked her how she was feeling and she kept saying, "I just feel like...punk."

-On the way home from the hospital she was a little out of it in the backseat and out of the blue she says, "I really need to get home so I can make you girls a sandwich!"

-While visiting an open house in her neighborhood she tells the realtor, "I have a friend who will be downloading, so she needs a smaller place."

-She asks me and my sister, "Have you guys seen the movie The Broad Side?" (we both say "No" knowing she meant the Blind Side.)

-Before making a phone call on her home phone she pretended to hit the buttons really fast while squinting into the phone. Then she says, "See? I'm teching, just like you guys do." (she meant texting)

-One morning it was pretty chilly and my mom had on a light weight jacket. I asked if the jacket was warm enough and she said, "Oh yes. And it breaks wind."

-At her follow up eye appointment she told the doctor when she can't see someone's face that well she has to look at them geeky.

our Sunday night

folding laundry...
eating cheese...
watching the masters (muted)...
listening to Lady Antebellum...
wearing rain boots...
drinking french champagne...
animals staring, waiting for a morsel...

this is our Sunday night.

It's starting again...

Look what Wrigley got in the mail today:


At least he's not like Chumley where he books a ticket and flees town for a week. I'm proud of him for bringing this to my attention (he's such an honest soul) but I'm afraid Bev is up to her old tricks again. Chumley received an anonymous lobster gram last week but now methinks I know the culprit.

our house, the brothel

When I come home, the animals always run to the door to greet me and before I step inside I'll greet them with an enthusiastic, "HEY THERE GANG!" or "HIIIII GUYS!" or like I did today, "HEYYYYY LOVERS!"

But what I didn't realize was that my neighbor was in his driveway, just a few feet away. He said Hi, I said Hi and went inside and now he probably thinks we're running some sort of sex ring out of the home.

It's almost 5:00

and still no sign of the blasted ADT man! Anyway since I can't do much of anything but stew in my own impatience I'll post some photos from last week.

My friend Michael came to visit me from California. It was so great to see him and it came at a really good time. I had a rather bizarre situation occur in the week preceding his visit (it was like being in an episode of the Twilight Zone because somehow, I got dragged into a really f*cked up situation by trying to help a friend) which led to my safety being threatened. Needless to say I have NEVER been a fan of hand guns nor have I ever wanted them in my home but when you feel, or rather are TOLD you are in danger, you will do anything to protect yourself and your family.

But I digress, it was great to see my friend especially when I needed a lift.

The sun came out on his second day here so we drank champagne and praised the sun Gods (even though it was about 40 degrees):


Then we went to Pike's Market in disguise and pretended to be foreign:


And to top it all off we had our very own Snuggie Pub Crawl through town:


We'd announce "NAP TIME!" and have to put our heads down for a mandatory 5 minute nap in the bar. Yes, we are crazy, no, we were not even drunk, just off our meds that day. Good times.

I miss doing stuff like this. Harmless fun. But anyway...

Then Saturday night Tom and I and a big group went to see Michael Buble in concert and he puts on a PHENOMENAL show.


He's an excellent performer and his singing appears effortless. He was born to entertain.


It was funny because he would banter with the crowd and while he was doing his shtick this crazy fan at the foot of the stage kept jumping up and down screaming I LOVE YOU and just being overly obnoxious throughout the whole show. He finally looked at her and said in the middle of bantering, "At one point in my career, I'm certain you will kill me." It was really funny but I hope to GOD not true!!


This is the first time I've seen him live and I couldn't get over how much he looks like a younger Matt Dillon. Look at this pic. This is Buble, not Dillon. They could be twins.


Here's another pic I found. He kind of reminds me of Enrique in this pose. Que te parace?


OMG, it's 5:10 and STILL no sign of the ADT man!!!

waiting for the ADT man

update:
It's now 4:22 and still no sign of him!!! Heads are GONNA ROLL!

I've been waiting for the ADT man to get here for going on 2 hours cuz our alarm keeps beeping randomly and after 2 phone calls to supervisor/technical support, no one can figure out what the issue is. ADT man was scheduled to come out tomorrow but the thing was beeping every 2-3 minutes this morning, driving me and the animals BONKERS so I called back and begged to get him out here sooner. I was told no, earliest was tomorrow and I told them that I hope I'm still here this time tomorrow because the beeping is going to send me to the looney bin. The woman on the phone could hear it and she apologized and said it would drive her crazy too. About a half hour later I get a call back saying that one of their technicians called in sick but he is close by and can come over after 1:00 today. I said I don't want him to make a trip if he is sick and then she told me that he was planning on working this afternoon, he just took the morning off. So now, here I am waiting for him hoping to God whatever he has isn't contagious.

The beeping has stopped, of course, now that he is on his way but hopefully he can figure out what caused it and can prevent it from happening again. One technician told me to make it stop I should take the batteries out of the control panels and then disconnect the power to the main box. I said "Yes but doesn't that defeat the purpose of an alarm system?" And he responded with, "Well you wanted to know how to stop the beeping." Customer service at its finest I tell ya.

I hope the field tech has a better answer.

And so, I wait.

Did I mention the last time an ADT tech came out he was here for 5 hours? Hope this guy likes pork tenderloin.

Old Macdonald had a...

Every time I pass a McDonald's, the word "MACdonald" comes into my head. It's what my Grandmother (Baba) calls McDonald's, totally emphasizing the MAC and never making it plural.

When my parents would travel for baseball or vacations, Baba would come and stay with us and we got away with murder. I mean literally, we could have probably murdered someone and she would be like, "Oh that's ok honey, I'll clean it up." It was a serious party when she was in town and I took full advantage LOVED every minute of it.

I'd experiment with things in the kitchen, like trying to make gum from marshmallows, mint leaves and food coloring, almost setting the kitchen on fire, or climbing up on the roof, running around like a banshee and when she'd rush outside in a panic asking what I was doing up there, I'd tell her that I'm just picking up leaves so they don't stick to the skylights. Then she'd smile and tell me I was such a good little helper.

For dinner she would ask me what I wanted and since I was never really allowed to eat fast food I'd ask her if it was ok to have McDonald's. She would say, "MACdonald? Sure honey, you can have MACdonald." And off we'd go in the car. Sometimes we'd eat in the restaurant, sometimes we'd take it home. She would hand me the bag and I'd start eating the french fries in the car shoving them in by the fistfuls. She'd say, "SLOW DOWN HONEY." But I couldn't, this was such a special treat and it felt like I was in some sort of fast food trance.

Here we are some 25+ years later, and every time I see those arches, I hear Baba's voice and it makes me smile.

things I save

Chumley walked across my keyboard and then stood on it for a bit, while I was doing a google search. This is what popped up in the google window:

[;p54444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444m,899999999

It made me laugh so of course I had to cut and paste it on here for no other reason than to look back at this and laugh again one day. I love when he does stuff like this.