Friday, July 23, 2010
Parent/Child Dynamic in Adulthood
Do you ever call your Mom (or Dad) all excited to share good news and as you're doing so this happens...
"Well, did you say this ----?"
"Why didn't you ask this ----?"
or my favorite:
"You should have done this ----."
Kind of takes the wind right outta your sails.
I know the role of a parent is to look out for their children no matter what age we grow up to be but sometimes, it's frustrating when you feel judgement or criticism for things you may have done "wrong" in their eyes, when in fact, they aren't wrong at all - maybe just different from what they would have done. Then why do I second guess myself?!?
Sometimes in these conversations, I need to remind myself that I'm an adult. I've managed to live on my own since 17 (tho I did move home for 10 months after college) but guess what, I'm still here. I purchased our first home at the age of 28 completely on my own solely with my income and credit (at that time Tom still had what I'd call "post college credit") and now 5 homes later, feel like I know a thing or two when it comes to that whole process.
But it's really not about that or any specific situation. It's about feeling the need for approval and then second guessing myself when I don't get it.
Posted by Me at 11:32 AM