(as a result of this)
I saw the photos you sent to my brother Chumley (I hacked into his email) and I think they are very, very naughty. You can't come dressed that way to our house. No way.
I have a girlfriend and her name is Ruth and she will not be happy with you parading around half naked flaunting your seven nipples. If you try to disrobe at any point while you are here I will throw my Snuggie on you.
Here's a picture of Ruth. She's really stunning.
I also have a boyfriend, his name is Norm but I don't think he'd mind seeing your nipples so let's just forget about him for right now.
Anyway, Chumley wanted me to tell you he's really looking forward to your visit.